How to teach your puppy to settle. Why calmness is a life skill
One of the things I hear a lot from new puppy owners is: “They just don't switch off!”, and I completely understand.
Puppies are exciting and excited by so many things. Everything is new. They want to investigate, play, sniff, explore, meet people and generally experience as much of the world as possible.
But learning how to settle and switch off is just as important as learning how to sit, stay or come when called.
In fact, I'd argue it's one of the most useful things you can teach your puppy.
Puppies don't automatically know how to relax
It's easy to assume that eventually a puppy will just get tired and settle. And yes, sometimes they do. But plenty of puppies actually need help learning how to regulate themselves and recognise that it's time to rest.
You will probably experience an overtired puppy seemingly becoming more and more wild, increasingly bitey (entering ‘shark mode’!), not engaging with you at all, wide-eyed and struggling to settle for even a second.
Learning when to engage and when to switch off is a really important part of growing up.
Why settling matters
Think about all the things you might want to do with your dog throughout their life. Visit friends. Travel somewhere new. Go to a pub or cafe. Wait while you're chatting to someone. Walk through a busy area. Spend a quiet evening at home.
A dog who can settle in different environments has a much easier time navigating all of these things. And that's particularly important for dogs living in and around London. There is a lot going on. People, dogs, traffic, bikes, buses, noises, smells and constant distractions can make everyday life quite stimulating.
Teaching your puppy that they don't need to react to or interact with everything around them is a critical foundation.
Calm doesn't mean boring
This is something I think is really important.
Teaching a puppy to settle doesn't mean stopping them having fun. Puppies should absolutely explore, play, run around, learn and enjoy themselves. But it's about finding the balance.
I want puppies to be able to engage with the world positively and disengage from it. To be able to say hello and calmly watch someone walk past. To play and then settle. To explore somewhere new and then relax.
How can you help your puppy learn to settle?
There isn't one magic exercise that will suddenly teach a puppy to switch off. It's something you build gradually through everyday life. For example:
Provide them with a solid structure.
A chaotic and unpredictable routine will not help a puppy settle. Again this doesn’t mean a routine should be devoid of fun, but they will thrive much better knowing what’s next in line throughout the day. Toilet opportunities, feeding times, play, obedience and training games, scent work, opportunities to socialise and experience the world, and of course rest.
Reward calm behaviour.
If your puppy quietly lies down next to you, that's worth noticing. Calm behaviour shouldn't only get attention when it's something we've specifically asked for. You can reward them in a way that matches the calm energy they’ve shown, showing gentle affection, or even just knowing that they’re happy and content lying next to you.
Don't make every distraction exciting.
Absolutely crucial! Your puppy doesn't need to greet every person or dog they see. It’s a mistake to let them get used to this. Sometimes you can encourage their focus back to you. Sometimes simply watching the world go by is enough.
Practice settling in different places.
At home is one thing. Being able to settle somewhere unfamiliar is a much more useful life skill. Try out different locations as part of your daily structure. This will form a really important part of socialisation where your puppy can explore the world in a calm and confident way, knowing when to engage and when to switch off.
Learn to recognise when your puppy has had enough.
Sometimes the crazy behaviour you're seeing isn't a puppy who needs more activity. It's an overtired puppy who needs help switching off. Puppies need a lot of sleep, and sometimes we can accidentally keep them going because we assume they're having fun.
What about puppy socialisation?
This is where settling and socialisation actually overlap.
Good socialisation isn't about exposing your puppy to as much as possible as quickly as possible. It's about helping them experience different people, dogs, environments, sounds and situations to a level that they learn about these things, but can cope with without feeling overwhelmed. Sometimes the best thing you can do is simply let your puppy observe. It’s all about balance. Sometimes a puppy will just sit and not want to move on - let it be. They’re taking everything in, and if you force it this will just overwhelm them.
They don't need to interact with every dog. They don't need to greet every person. They don't need to investigate everything. Learning that they can be around exciting things without becoming completely overwhelmed is a really valuable skill.
This is something we work on in my puppy classes
My puppy classes in Tooting, South London aren't built around getting six puppies to perform a list of obedience exercises perfectly. They're about giving puppies and their guardians the foundations they need for everyday life. That includes:
Building confidence
Developing calm engagement
Learning to settle
Understanding puppy body language
Coping with distractions
Developing focus
Experiencing new environments
Learning when to engage and when to switch off
Because ultimately, I don't want to help you raise a puppy who only knows ‘sit’ and ‘down’. I want to help you raise a dog who feels comfortable, confident and at ease with the world around them.
My next 6-week puppy training course starts 5th September in Tooting, South London.
Classes are kept small, with just six puppies, so there's plenty of individual guidance and the environment stays calm and supportive.
If you're looking for puppy classes that focus on more than obedience, you can find out more below.